"Change of Life" - more like "Total Disruption of All Things Normal". I love menopause. No, not really. But I figure if I say it, I might start to believe it. Like the Natalie Wood character of Susan in Miracle on 34th Street, when she's riding in the back of the car on the way home from the party and keeps saying, "I believe, I believe, it's silly but I believe".
My first hot flash, we were in Nebraska. It was 20 below with a windchill colder than that. We were in a rental that was not by any stretch of the imagination sealed against the weather. Now, understand - I usually have 3 blankets on my side of the bed, and Hal sleeps outside of the covers. I woke up REALLY hot. So, I rationally thought that Hal must be DYING if I was that hot. So, loving wife that I am, I threw ALL of the covers off the bed. Not off my side onto his. Off the bed. Totally. Onto my side of the floor. And my poor husband woke up wondering when we moved to the Arctic Circle. As he would continue the story, he realized that there was a burning ember in the bed, so he just curled up next to me and kept warm.
Hot flashes, lack of concentration, insomnia, irritability, erratic cycles - you name it, I've got it. The hot flashes bother me the least, I think. The irritability is Hal's biggest problem - of course because he sees it the most. The insomnia is killing me - not even "p.m. strength" acetaminophen helps. And I've tried prescription sleep aids in the past that have not helped (except to give me weird dreams, and I have enough problems with my dreams...but that's a story for another day).
But last night, yeah, last night I think was my moment. I told Hal that I was going to stay on the couch all night - I wasn't feeling well, and I didn't want to bother him with my up and down all night. So I told him that I was staying downstairs - you know, because of my amnesia. He looked at me kinda funny - and I realized what I had said. So I said - "Yeah, amnesia. Because I forgot it's insomnia that I have, ok???"
And there you have it. So if you see me somewhere, and I'm acting strange - I'm not acting. I'm just changing.
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Thursday, March 17, 2011
It's the Most Wonderful Time...
The first time that I heard the Staples' back-to-school ad playing "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year," I did not have my head turned to the tv. My first thought was to cringe, thinking that someone was already doing Christmas ads in the summer. When I turned towards the television, I burst out laughing at those two pitiful-looking children, drudging down the aisle, heads down, pushing the cart, getting their back to school supplies, with their dad coming behind them leaping for joy. For some parents, I think back-to-school is the most wonderful time - I watch as working friends struggle to find summer daycare for their children; as others figure out drop-off/pick-up summer camp/class schedules that some rocket scientists would have problems figuring out; as some come back more stressed from their "vacation" than they were when they left - you get the idea.
This evening, as I cleaned up after supper, I heard that song in my head and I thought, yeah, this is the most wonderful time. Supper is over, clean-up is over, a load of clothes in the washer - AND IT"S STILL LIGHT OUT!!! It's getting warmer, brighter, and today the sky was a bright blue instead of overcast.
It's a time of new life. Of new shoots, new grass, new flowers, baby birds and other baby animals. Let us reflect in these Lenten days the opportunity we have for new life, for change in direction, for repentance and the accompanying forgiveness.
This evening, as I cleaned up after supper, I heard that song in my head and I thought, yeah, this is the most wonderful time. Supper is over, clean-up is over, a load of clothes in the washer - AND IT"S STILL LIGHT OUT!!! It's getting warmer, brighter, and today the sky was a bright blue instead of overcast.
It's a time of new life. Of new shoots, new grass, new flowers, baby birds and other baby animals. Let us reflect in these Lenten days the opportunity we have for new life, for change in direction, for repentance and the accompanying forgiveness.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
What's in a Name, fini
Ah...I am now Connie Wagner Garlick, as recognized by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. What can be done with the RIGHT person at a state representative's office, and a few pieces of paper (like, federal tax forms with my right name; statement from Social Security Administration with my right name, copies of drivers license and state tax forms from other states with my right name).
(with apologies to Neil Armstrong): One small step for woman; one giant blow against bureaucracy. Ok, probably not a giant blow - but it sure felt like it when I got my corrected license in the mail.
(with apologies to Neil Armstrong): One small step for woman; one giant blow against bureaucracy. Ok, probably not a giant blow - but it sure felt like it when I got my corrected license in the mail.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Breaking Silence
Just over 6 months...for no reason, exactly. And yet, for many reasons. Sometimes, what I want to say is too private to be said in a public forum, so I say nothing. Sometimes, I'm just too busy. Sometimes, I'm just too lazy.
On this Ash Wednesday, I am breaking the fast of words that I have held. This does not mean that the flood gates will open and that you will be reading any mush that falls out of my brain. It means that I will begin to share my voice again.
As Lent begins, so begins the call of churches to deprive one's self, to share with others, to spend one's time in studying God more...things that we should be doing, or calling each other to do, all year, not just for a period of 40 days. But we can handle 40 days, can't we? We can give up (candy, computer games, coffee, whatever) for 40 days, can't we? We can go to a Bible study once a week for 6 weeks, or an extra church service during the week for 6 weeks, can't we? We can...yeah, but why can't we the rest of the time?
Don't get me wrong. I know that we live in a post-Christian era, whether we want to admit it or not. I know that we are busy: that our kids are overscheduled and, as a result, our parents are overscheduled. I know that church is not the priority it was in the past.
For those of us who call ourselves Christian, we need to decide: Is God a priority in our lives? If we say that God is a priority in our lives, do our schedules reflect that? Do the schedules of our children reflect that? Do our lives in general - our actions, our financial decisions, the tv shows we watch and the music we listen to - reflect that?
If the answers to the questions in the above paragraph is overwhelmingly "no", then might I suggest that the days of this Lenten season be used to reflect on how those answers can be changed to "yes".
On this Ash Wednesday, I am breaking the fast of words that I have held. This does not mean that the flood gates will open and that you will be reading any mush that falls out of my brain. It means that I will begin to share my voice again.
As Lent begins, so begins the call of churches to deprive one's self, to share with others, to spend one's time in studying God more...things that we should be doing, or calling each other to do, all year, not just for a period of 40 days. But we can handle 40 days, can't we? We can give up (candy, computer games, coffee, whatever) for 40 days, can't we? We can go to a Bible study once a week for 6 weeks, or an extra church service during the week for 6 weeks, can't we? We can...yeah, but why can't we the rest of the time?
Don't get me wrong. I know that we live in a post-Christian era, whether we want to admit it or not. I know that we are busy: that our kids are overscheduled and, as a result, our parents are overscheduled. I know that church is not the priority it was in the past.
For those of us who call ourselves Christian, we need to decide: Is God a priority in our lives? If we say that God is a priority in our lives, do our schedules reflect that? Do the schedules of our children reflect that? Do our lives in general - our actions, our financial decisions, the tv shows we watch and the music we listen to - reflect that?
If the answers to the questions in the above paragraph is overwhelmingly "no", then might I suggest that the days of this Lenten season be used to reflect on how those answers can be changed to "yes".
Friday, September 3, 2010
Restoring Honor
Hal and I went to the Restoring Honor Rally on August 28 at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, DC. I will admit a little trepidation,
Sunday, August 1, 2010
The Stuff of Earth
The late Rich Mullins wrote the line "The stuff of earth competes for the allegiance I owe only to the Giver of all good things" in his "If I Stand". It was very appropriate for today's lectionary readings in church.
First, from Ecclesiates 1 and 2, the Preacher proclaiming "all is vanity and a striving after wind." (Ecclesiastes 1:14, all scripture today ESV). The Epistle reading, from Colossians 3 tells us to "Set (y)our minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." (3:2) - this reading talks about non-physical earthly things: sexual immorality, evil desire, greed, anger, slander, and other such "things" of earth. We who are Christians are supposed to have left the old self behind. I know that if you get me in NJ traffic, sometimes I allow the old self to slip out. I should not; I should hold to my "new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator" (3:10)
The Gospel reading today, from Luke 12:13-21, talks more about the physical "stuff of earth". The parable of the rich farmer, who has a bumper crop, and decides to hoard it. Eleven times the words I and my are used. There is no mention of family, nor is there mention of giving a tithe to the temple or a portion to the poor. He builds bigger barns to store his goods so that he may now live a life of ease. And then he dies that night. Great lot of good his new barns and his bumper crop did him, eh?
So what does this mean? Mullins puts it in the simplest of terms. We do not owe our allegiance to anything here on earth. Not our jobs, families, possessions, not even to the churches or synagogues where we worship. We owe our allegiance only to God, who has given all to us. This does not mean we should sit back, relax, do nothing. This does not mean we should not enjoy our possessions.
Rather, we should not put either our faith or our energy into what is truly vanity, that which is passing and will not be eternal. Our hearts should be turned to the Giver of those things that are ours for a time, for a season.
First, from Ecclesiates 1 and 2, the Preacher proclaiming "all is vanity and a striving after wind." (Ecclesiastes 1:14, all scripture today ESV). The Epistle reading, from Colossians 3 tells us to "Set (y)our minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." (3:2) - this reading talks about non-physical earthly things: sexual immorality, evil desire, greed, anger, slander, and other such "things" of earth. We who are Christians are supposed to have left the old self behind. I know that if you get me in NJ traffic, sometimes I allow the old self to slip out. I should not; I should hold to my "new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator" (3:10)
The Gospel reading today, from Luke 12:13-21, talks more about the physical "stuff of earth". The parable of the rich farmer, who has a bumper crop, and decides to hoard it. Eleven times the words I and my are used. There is no mention of family, nor is there mention of giving a tithe to the temple or a portion to the poor. He builds bigger barns to store his goods so that he may now live a life of ease. And then he dies that night. Great lot of good his new barns and his bumper crop did him, eh?
So what does this mean? Mullins puts it in the simplest of terms. We do not owe our allegiance to anything here on earth. Not our jobs, families, possessions, not even to the churches or synagogues where we worship. We owe our allegiance only to God, who has given all to us. This does not mean we should sit back, relax, do nothing. This does not mean we should not enjoy our possessions.
Rather, we should not put either our faith or our energy into what is truly vanity, that which is passing and will not be eternal. Our hearts should be turned to the Giver of those things that are ours for a time, for a season.
Monday, July 12, 2010
What's in a Name, Part II
So...I'm off on an establishment rant again...
Was thinking about my PA driver's license today, because a friend was talking about renewing her license. And I got ticked. Again.
When I married Hal, I had to get a new Social Security card. Chose to list my name as Connie Wagner Garlick, dropping my middle name (Marie). The Social Security Administration, seeing my birth certificate and marriage certificate, accepted this as my name. So did the Internal Revenue Service.
The state of Ohio gave me no trouble issuing a driver's license in the name of Connie Wagner Garlick, or Connie W. Garlick (I don't remember if they used middle name or initial).
The state of South Carolina - Connie Wagner Garlick.
The state of Nebraska - Connie Wagner Garlick.
You would THINK that this is a national trend, allowing someone to use the name that they have chosen upon their marriage.
Think again.
The commonwealth of Pennsylvania - the woman across the counter at the DMV - crossed out Wagner as my middle name and wrote Marie. I told her that was not my name. She insisted that it was. I told her that I had changed my name when I married. Showed her my Social Security Card again. She told me that using the name on the Social Security card "USED" to be legal. She insisted that my middle name is Marie, that she had to use the middle name on my birth certificate.
I went to my state representative's office shortly after getting a PA DL that does not match the name on my bank accounts, IRS info, SS card...and got a young woman behind a desk who called the DMV, would not let me talk to them, laughed with the person on the phone, and smugly told me that was the law. I told her it was a stupid law (I may have thrown in a non-preacherly word) and got up and left.
I still think it's a stupid law. Two entities of the federal government and three other states recognize me as who I choose to be. The sad thing is, I really like where we're living and don't want to move just so I can get my real name back on a driver's license. *sigh* I will just have to get our representative on one of his public appearances and get him to understand that this is a law that needs to be changed. Or just have a driver's license that matches none of my other information until I retire and move from PA.
Oh - and to top it off - the same woman HIT ON MY HUSBAND the next week, when he went to get his license. Thankfully, I was not in the building when it happened, or I'd be writing this from jail.
Was thinking about my PA driver's license today, because a friend was talking about renewing her license. And I got ticked. Again.
When I married Hal, I had to get a new Social Security card. Chose to list my name as Connie Wagner Garlick, dropping my middle name (Marie). The Social Security Administration, seeing my birth certificate and marriage certificate, accepted this as my name. So did the Internal Revenue Service.
The state of Ohio gave me no trouble issuing a driver's license in the name of Connie Wagner Garlick, or Connie W. Garlick (I don't remember if they used middle name or initial).
The state of South Carolina - Connie Wagner Garlick.
The state of Nebraska - Connie Wagner Garlick.
You would THINK that this is a national trend, allowing someone to use the name that they have chosen upon their marriage.
Think again.
The commonwealth of Pennsylvania - the woman across the counter at the DMV - crossed out Wagner as my middle name and wrote Marie. I told her that was not my name. She insisted that it was. I told her that I had changed my name when I married. Showed her my Social Security Card again. She told me that using the name on the Social Security card "USED" to be legal. She insisted that my middle name is Marie, that she had to use the middle name on my birth certificate.
I went to my state representative's office shortly after getting a PA DL that does not match the name on my bank accounts, IRS info, SS card...and got a young woman behind a desk who called the DMV, would not let me talk to them, laughed with the person on the phone, and smugly told me that was the law. I told her it was a stupid law (I may have thrown in a non-preacherly word) and got up and left.
I still think it's a stupid law. Two entities of the federal government and three other states recognize me as who I choose to be. The sad thing is, I really like where we're living and don't want to move just so I can get my real name back on a driver's license. *sigh* I will just have to get our representative on one of his public appearances and get him to understand that this is a law that needs to be changed. Or just have a driver's license that matches none of my other information until I retire and move from PA.
Oh - and to top it off - the same woman HIT ON MY HUSBAND the next week, when he went to get his license. Thankfully, I was not in the building when it happened, or I'd be writing this from jail.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
