Stories for Another Day, Part 3*: The Elephant in Our Bedroom

So, last night, neither Hal nor I slept well. We both got up around 2 am, were up for a little while, and then went back to bed. And that's when these two dreams happened. Well, actually, they happened some time later, after Hal had gotten "up" up (as in, got up to get ready to go to the office).

First: Hal and I were in our bedroom. Only it wasn't our bedroom, it was a room with twin beds, located in my Aunt Tillie & Uncle Bunnie's house, and the bedrooms were interconnected (which they were not at my aunt and uncle's, but I digress...). We had come upstairs to go to bed after finding one of our elephants had died. When we were in bed(s), our other elephant, Lucy, whose trunk was cut (like, 3/4 of the way through it about 2/3 of the way up the trunk) (but she was still swinging it), was crying. Elephant tears (as opposed to crocodile tears). Hal told her to settle down, I reached out and patted her trunk. She turned around and settled. I left the room (through a door that does not exist at either house), and walked down the hall, taking a step down, continuing down the hall, taking another step down, and going to the back door, all the while thinking this would be a great facebook post - that Lucy had turned around in our bedroom - but that no-one would believe that we had a pet elephant...

Mind you, NOT thinking that there would be no way that I would get an elephant into our house, up the stairs, and in through the bedroom door. Yeah. Just that no-one would believe we had a pet elephant. Named Lucy. That had room to turn around in our bedroom.

Back to the dream: At the back door (which was decidedly at my aunt and uncle's, including the 2nd step down in the hallway which led to the bathroom and laundry room)(and how did they raise 3 kids in a house with only one bathroom, anyway???), I looked out, and copious amounts of dirt and mud were being pushed out from under the steps through the space between the top of the porch and the drop-down board (I know there's a technical name for that but...) - so I called Hal. 'Cause he's my husband and I call him when I need something scary taken care of... And by the time he gets there, out pops this beautiful bird, mostly white, with blue on its head, tuft and down its neck. Not a bird I have ever seen. I remember thinking in the dream that it was something that belonged in a tropical setting, not in NJ or PA.

So, then, I don't know if it's part of the same dream or another, I was sitting on a couch, by a table. On the table were piled kid's plastic building blocks. Not built into anything, just piled. And they started falling onto me, the couch, and the sheet that was covering me. And Hal was there. Neither one of us knew WHY the blocks were falling on me. Until I saw IT. And could not figure out if it was a large black moth or a small...BAT...because its face looked like a bat face but the wings were rather powdery looking. I yelled for Hal to look at it, but then it went down the back of the couch UNDER THE SHEET and I tried to trap it (or at least keep it from crawling on me). I remember yelling Hal's name over and over...and over...and at some point I became aware that I was in bed, that I was not in that dream anymore, but I still could not wake up - I was yelling "Hal", "Up!", "Wake", "Help", and was hitting the blankets on top of me, trying to get his attention. I even dreamed in this part, that Hal walked into the room and ignored me because he thought I was kidding. I woke myself just as he came up the stairs to finish getting ready for work.

Now...understand that I have nightmares about every other month. And, when I try to wake myself up screaming, Hal gently reaches over, puts his arm around me, tells me it's ok, he's there, and that he loves me. So it's not like he would ignore me - I just think that in my state I must have been thinking, he'd wake me if he knew. Especially if he knew it was about a bat, because he knows how I feel about them. (FYI: They are fine if they stay outside. In my turf, they need to go.)

As for Lucy - I know that Lucy the Elephant in Margate, NJ is in my mental history. Not that I've ever been to her - I think I've been past her. But why was her trunk cut? Why was she in our bedroom (unless it's because I was gassy last night...and whenever "that" sound escapes, one or the other of us calls out "It's an elephant!")(yes, we're that old and still do fart jokes). Crying? Well, our one cat, Callie, cried for months after Wesley, the cat we adopted with her, died (poisoned Chinese cat food). I may have heard her in the middle of the night, and just made her an elephant instead of a cat. But it's the year of the dragon...

Yeah, don't try to analyze them for me...just understand, these are NORMAL dreams...and if I take a sleep aid, they are worse. So yeah, I deal with my insomnia by just not sleeping.

*Yes, I skipped parts 1 & 2; weird dreams was the 3rd mention of "Stories for Another Day"; I'll get to 1 & 2...yup, you guessed it, another day.

New Bathing Suits and Other Horrors

If you've read my blog at all, you KNOW how much I LOVE clothes shopping. Yeah. Like, I'd rather have my finger or toe nails pulled out one-by-one. Or go to a lecture on medieval personal hygiene (wait, that could be interesting). Or...well, you get the picture. I hate the prices, I hate the styles, I hate having to try clothes on.

This summer Hal and I will have been married for 10 years. Yup, 10 big ones. And while we loved camping last year, we decided that for #10 we should do it up bigger than normal. So we are going on a cruise this year. Yes, I know, that ship just went aground and a number of people lost their lives. We'll have a different captain (dear God, we'll have a different captain, right?)

I decided, for a cruise, I should probably have a bathing suit. Not one from Goodwill, like I bought last year (and put shorts on over it). But a real, new bathing suit. From a "buy new stuff here" store.

Understand, I don't swim much. I was in my Goodwill suit twice last year. Which is more than I've been in a pool in...a while. I was in my 30's when I learned how to swim. At the Y. With a very patient instructor. I was not the only newbie in the class, so I didn't feel too bad. I was told that I was odd in that I swim underwater, not on the surface. I guess that's odd. I don't know.

So...for the last month or so, I've been looking for a suit. Something befitting someone of my age and...um...size. And budget. I think I'd have better luck finding a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, a buried treasure, or the cure for the common cold.

I have found several that I like...my colors, my style...oops, out of my size. My color, my style...bottom in my size, no appropriate top (or vice versa). My color, my size...and showing more flesh than my doctor normally sees. My color, my size, my style...and costing more than my first car did.

So. Yeah. Probably not going to buy a bathing suit for the cruise. Will wear some nice flowing skirt or maybe a pair of shorts (if I don't go insane trying to find a pair that's...appropriate).